Well it's almost here, New Year's Eve and out of all the holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's) this is the one I think will bother me the most of my "firsts" without Mike. Mike and I didn't make "big deals" out of Thanksgiving or Christmas. We'd spend those two days together and we didn't buy each other Christmas gifts, so while it was sad he wasn't here, it wasn't like we did huge things those days and bought each other big gifts - hopefully that made sense.
But New Year's Eve is another story. We'd stay home, maybe rent a movie or two or watch tv. Maybe get out old photo albums to remember fun vacations or look at our mug collection in the kitchen and remember where we bought them and then wait for the ball to drop at midnight and have our New Year's Eve kiss. For the first time in 26 years I'll watch the ball drop on my own and no kiss from my sweetie - that's going to be rough. And I think why it will bother me is because something is ending (this year) and something else is beginning (next year) and I'm beginning it without Mike and right now that bothers me too. It's like a door is finally closing on something and again I'm not sure if I like that or not.
But whether I like it or not - time marches on. So Butler and I will either see if something good is on tv or I'll read a book and he'll be on the bed with me part of the evening. Hopefully I can either stay awake until midnight or I'll have to set my alarm to wake me at 11:45 p.m. so I can turn the tv on to watch the ball drop. A couple of years ago we read or heard how Jesse and Kathy Duplantis or Kenneth and Gloria Copeland did communion on New Year's Eve to welcome the new year in. We did that for a couple of years but we forgot to do that this past year for some reason - but I'm going to have my own personal communion time tomorrow night.
As for New Year's resolutions - haven't even given that a thought - but I will tomorrow.
